Today is my second anniversary with my wife. I will post a much better post on my other, more beloved but less attended to, blog: The Bleeding Ear. So, go check it out. It use to be a daily blog about politics and Vietnam and stuff. Now, because of this and med school in general, I don't have time. Heck, i don't have time for these short SHORT daily posts. So I'm gonna make it a weekly thing. That way I cna schedule it into my Sundays and get something on it. I don't want to let it go.
So, go there for today's post.
Monday, October 09, 2006
Friday, October 06, 2006
Day 53: Friday and Ears
I am so glad its Friday. Now all i have is a weekend of more studying. At least tonight I'll break it up by doing what? Yep, you guessed it. Mattress shopping. Tonight's Dillards.
Today we had to disect the ear in Gross. We came at it two ways. Superiorly (from the top) and laterally (from the outside in). Out of the four of us, two did one and two did the other. I went laterally. It was tough. I think we called the professor over three times over the course of the three hours we were in there to make sure we were doing things right. The hard part are the structures of the inner ear. They are all so small. One small misstep and you're screwed.
That's what happened to our superior route. The two working on that side usually do a great job, but today, trying to follow vague directions while chiseling through thin bone, was just not our day. That side was totally demolished. But its ok, because have the lateral side.
And we weren't the only ones. Many people demolished part or all of their ears too. Beware the ear.
Today we had to disect the ear in Gross. We came at it two ways. Superiorly (from the top) and laterally (from the outside in). Out of the four of us, two did one and two did the other. I went laterally. It was tough. I think we called the professor over three times over the course of the three hours we were in there to make sure we were doing things right. The hard part are the structures of the inner ear. They are all so small. One small misstep and you're screwed.
That's what happened to our superior route. The two working on that side usually do a great job, but today, trying to follow vague directions while chiseling through thin bone, was just not our day. That side was totally demolished. But its ok, because have the lateral side.
And we weren't the only ones. Many people demolished part or all of their ears too. Beware the ear.
Thursday, October 05, 2006
Day 52: x96 (fm 96.3)
Houston's radio stations suck. For the first couple months here, I just bent over and took it, but not any more. I listen to x96. No, this is not Sirius Satellite Radio. It's not XM radio either. It's just good radio.
See, I grew up here, and never knew bad radio. Back then we listen to 104.1 and 107.5. However, both stations sold out to Clear Channel, and now they're horrible -- unless you have the memory of a goldfish.
Clear Channel has some moron in New York City put together a playlist of money-makers over the last twenty years and plays them over and over and over again. I can't tell you how many times I've heard Nirvana in one week.
x96, is a radio station out of Salt Lake City. First, they haven't sold out to big corporations, so they still play local music, new music, and are willing to try different things. This makes for a refreshing, hip, current mix of music, with some old stuff thrown in every once in a while. Second, their morning show, the "Radio from Hell Show," is absolutely the best morning show I have ever heard. Period. The three djs, Kerry, Bill, and Gina, have a chemistry wanted by all in radio and television and achieved by few.
So, in the mornings, or when I need to change gears from one subject to another, I listen to x96.com.
See, I grew up here, and never knew bad radio. Back then we listen to 104.1 and 107.5. However, both stations sold out to Clear Channel, and now they're horrible -- unless you have the memory of a goldfish.
Clear Channel has some moron in New York City put together a playlist of money-makers over the last twenty years and plays them over and over and over again. I can't tell you how many times I've heard Nirvana in one week.
x96, is a radio station out of Salt Lake City. First, they haven't sold out to big corporations, so they still play local music, new music, and are willing to try different things. This makes for a refreshing, hip, current mix of music, with some old stuff thrown in every once in a while. Second, their morning show, the "Radio from Hell Show," is absolutely the best morning show I have ever heard. Period. The three djs, Kerry, Bill, and Gina, have a chemistry wanted by all in radio and television and achieved by few.
So, in the mornings, or when I need to change gears from one subject to another, I listen to x96.com.
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
Day 51: Beds
I keep getting farther and farther behind. My friends wonder how I'll ever catch up. Every night I go out with my wife looking for mattresses, since we're moving. My wife, bless her heart, has been to every matress store this side of Timbuktu. Hopefully, by the time we move in to our place, we'll have a matress. Oh yeah, but the date got moved to the 16th. So I don't get down here until the week before second block exams.
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
Day 50: Dinner With an Old Friend
So the other day I wrote about meeting my friend Anh on the bus, serendipitously. Well, today we went out to eat together. It was a great time.
Not that we went anywhere special, just the McGovern Commons, but nonetheless, it was fun. If I had a way of getting pictures off of my phone without paying T-mobile my first born child, I'd post a pic of us playing chess with a huge chessboard. It's outdoors, made of plastic, and each piece comes up to my knee. Very fun. She thoroughly beat me.
Then we went inside and got Chinese/Vietnamese from Kim Son. The lady serving was floored because I was speaking to Anh in Viet. Can't a white guy have a little fun? We can learn languages other than English. lol.
Lunch was talking about life and Vietnam, and food, and making plans to do this again. It was a great break from the stress that is medical school.
Not that we went anywhere special, just the McGovern Commons, but nonetheless, it was fun. If I had a way of getting pictures off of my phone without paying T-mobile my first born child, I'd post a pic of us playing chess with a huge chessboard. It's outdoors, made of plastic, and each piece comes up to my knee. Very fun. She thoroughly beat me.
Then we went inside and got Chinese/Vietnamese from Kim Son. The lady serving was floored because I was speaking to Anh in Viet. Can't a white guy have a little fun? We can learn languages other than English. lol.
Lunch was talking about life and Vietnam, and food, and making plans to do this again. It was a great break from the stress that is medical school.
Monday, October 02, 2006
Day 49: Monday
Here's to another Monday. I keep spending the weekends doing things other than school, and it gets me behind. This weekend I went up to Austin as the alternate delegate for my American Medical Association/Texas Medical Association student chapter. The Texas Medical Association was having a conference. It was very interesting to see how the organization runs. Even more interesting was going to eat at Sullivans afterwards and getting a $30 12 oz. Filet Mignon.
Friday, September 29, 2006
Day 46: Baby
The word of the day is BABY.
Today we had a good Devo lecture about the Branchial (Pharyngeal) apparatus. Our lecturer ended with some pictures of babies, and the rhetorical question, "isn't it all about babies?"
Then I met my friend Jamie and his coworker Will for lunch and I took the rail to get there. I sit down behind a young white man and his hispanic girlfriend, and nearly laugh while studying my Anatomy flash cards as I overhear his pleading.
Then, as I'm leaving the rail, a tall black man gets off right in front of me, and stops at the door, turns to a white woman sitting by the door, and says,
Then he got off the rail, and I met my friends for lunch.
So, that's the word of the day: BABY
Today we had a good Devo lecture about the Branchial (Pharyngeal) apparatus. Our lecturer ended with some pictures of babies, and the rhetorical question, "isn't it all about babies?"
Then I met my friend Jamie and his coworker Will for lunch and I took the rail to get there. I sit down behind a young white man and his hispanic girlfriend, and nearly laugh while studying my Anatomy flash cards as I overhear his pleading.
"Baby, I just wanna make us like the way it was."
"..."
"Yes, I know, baby, but we can try to get as close to that as possible, baby."
"You know I love you, baby. Why don't we just **** this and go to Cancun, baby. We'll rob a bar and get naked on the beach. Come on, baby."
Then, as I'm leaving the rail, a tall black man gets off right in front of me, and stops at the door, turns to a white woman sitting by the door, and says,
"Baby, you got pretty eyes, baby."
Then he got off the rail, and I met my friends for lunch.
So, that's the word of the day: BABY
Thursday, September 28, 2006
Day 45: ICM sucks
I don't understand why such a great idea can be put into practice so inefficiently. As a first-semester MS1, I take Biochemistry (Biochem), Developmental Anatomy (Devo), Gross Anatomy (Gross), Histology (Histo), and Introduction to Clinical Medicine (ICM). Each class is hard, quirky, and requires lots of practice to succeed. Also, each class is coordinated well.
Every summer, the class leader works with lecturers to put together a syllabus and set up a course outline. Upon starting school, I received (bought) my syllabi for each class, and received a calendar/schedule.
How come every class except ICM did this? Gross made minor changes to the schedule, but announced all semester changes at one time a couple weeks ago. In contrast, ICM cannot seem to do anything by the book. Every week an email is received adding some online assignment, or cancelling some class. All of this change requires a lot from already hugely busy medical students.
We just finished Block 1 exams, so my fellow student Richard bought a ticket out of the state to visit his girlfriend. This was predicated on a couple assumptions: 1. There's nothing to study because its the first weekend of Block 2. 2. He was scheduled for the last day of ICM every week in Block 1. However, two days before he is to leave, he is told via email that he's been changed to the first day, causing him to jump through hoops to find someone to switch timeslots with so he doesn't miss his flight.
Now Yom Kippur. ICM is cancelled for Yom Kippur. I like having the class canceled, but this isn't someone getting sick at the last minute--it's Yom Kippur. You kinda know a year in advance when this holiday is, and can plan ahead for it.
Is it too much to ask from professionals to efficiently organize this class?
Every summer, the class leader works with lecturers to put together a syllabus and set up a course outline. Upon starting school, I received (bought) my syllabi for each class, and received a calendar/schedule.
How come every class except ICM did this? Gross made minor changes to the schedule, but announced all semester changes at one time a couple weeks ago. In contrast, ICM cannot seem to do anything by the book. Every week an email is received adding some online assignment, or cancelling some class. All of this change requires a lot from already hugely busy medical students.
We just finished Block 1 exams, so my fellow student Richard bought a ticket out of the state to visit his girlfriend. This was predicated on a couple assumptions: 1. There's nothing to study because its the first weekend of Block 2. 2. He was scheduled for the last day of ICM every week in Block 1. However, two days before he is to leave, he is told via email that he's been changed to the first day, causing him to jump through hoops to find someone to switch timeslots with so he doesn't miss his flight.
Now Yom Kippur. ICM is cancelled for Yom Kippur. I like having the class canceled, but this isn't someone getting sick at the last minute--it's Yom Kippur. You kinda know a year in advance when this holiday is, and can plan ahead for it.
Is it too much to ask from professionals to efficiently organize this class?
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
Day 44: Losing Face
Today we disected the face in Gross. It was a tedious, tedious lab. The skin on the eyelid is the thinnest skin in your body, and the rest of the face isn't far behind. Also, nerves in the face are about as thick as floss, branch every which way, and sometimes just pop out of the bone, literally.
Either way, it sucked going back in the lab for the first time after tests, but it was good that I got to disect this lab, because it is so intricate. Do you know that your smiling muscle is Zygomaticus major?? Well, now you do. I wish they'd let us take pics of the cadavers so you could see the progression of the disection, but for obvious reasons they do not, and I whole-heartedly agree with those reasons. I'm very thankful that these men and women donated their bodies so my classmates and I can learn medicine, and I wouldn't want to disrespect that.
You hear about stories of med students doing stupid things in Gross, such as storing flasks of whisky in bodies, or chopping off penises and playing catch. Those stories always disgusted me when I heard them, and I'm happy to say that nothing like that has happened in my class. Nothing even remotely close. The staff did a great job of educating the students at the beginning of the semester about the proper ettiquete around bodies and my classmates have been very mature about it. That doesn't mean there isn't the occasional joviality in lab, it just means its never done at the expense of or disrespect to the cadaver. Life's got too many other funny things to laugh about than to be immature around cadavers.
Either way, it sucked going back in the lab for the first time after tests, but it was good that I got to disect this lab, because it is so intricate. Do you know that your smiling muscle is Zygomaticus major?? Well, now you do. I wish they'd let us take pics of the cadavers so you could see the progression of the disection, but for obvious reasons they do not, and I whole-heartedly agree with those reasons. I'm very thankful that these men and women donated their bodies so my classmates and I can learn medicine, and I wouldn't want to disrespect that.
You hear about stories of med students doing stupid things in Gross, such as storing flasks of whisky in bodies, or chopping off penises and playing catch. Those stories always disgusted me when I heard them, and I'm happy to say that nothing like that has happened in my class. Nothing even remotely close. The staff did a great job of educating the students at the beginning of the semester about the proper ettiquete around bodies and my classmates have been very mature about it. That doesn't mean there isn't the occasional joviality in lab, it just means its never done at the expense of or disrespect to the cadaver. Life's got too many other funny things to laugh about than to be immature around cadavers.
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Day 43: Plumbing Problems
The subplot to my med school melodrama is the thriller of trying to buy a condo. My wife and I have been looking for a place since July. We've been staying with my folks, about an hour away, and I've been riding the bus into town and back since. We finally found a place, had the bid accepted, and are now running around like chickens with our heads cut off, making sure everything is ok so we can close in a couple weeks.
Oh, it will be nice to close and have a place CLOSE to school.
So, the wife went to transfer the title of my father's old Honda Accord to us yesterday, but they wouldn't let her because we didn't have insurance on the thing. We bought it from my parents for cheap, because we're really poor. So, today, my wife and I went to State Farm and got insurance on the bad boy so tomorrow she can get the title transfered.
In the morning we took the bus and mapped her route from home to her new job. She gets to practice her Public Health degree with the city. It should be good for her, and they seem to like her. Plus, she won't need to drive, which is a big plus because she doesn't have a lot of experience driving in big cities.
However, we also needed a plumber and electrician to look at the place we're buying, because the inspector suggested it. So, I met our realtor at the place and the plumber looked things over. About $1000 to fix the toilet, shower, and kitchen faucet. I left to go back to school and the electrician came. My wife said he wanted $1225 to replace the breaker box which is obsolete, but not broken.
Man, the money's flying and I'm not even making anything yet. We'll probably wait on the breaker box and I'll do most of the plumbing myself. It pays to have a dad who's a handiman and I've learned a little by his side.
Either way, I missed this new Clinical Applications class. I don't even know what it's about. It just showed up on my schedule, and they sent out some email a day or two ago. Whatever.
Oh, it will be nice to close and have a place CLOSE to school.
So, the wife went to transfer the title of my father's old Honda Accord to us yesterday, but they wouldn't let her because we didn't have insurance on the thing. We bought it from my parents for cheap, because we're really poor. So, today, my wife and I went to State Farm and got insurance on the bad boy so tomorrow she can get the title transfered.
In the morning we took the bus and mapped her route from home to her new job. She gets to practice her Public Health degree with the city. It should be good for her, and they seem to like her. Plus, she won't need to drive, which is a big plus because she doesn't have a lot of experience driving in big cities.
However, we also needed a plumber and electrician to look at the place we're buying, because the inspector suggested it. So, I met our realtor at the place and the plumber looked things over. About $1000 to fix the toilet, shower, and kitchen faucet. I left to go back to school and the electrician came. My wife said he wanted $1225 to replace the breaker box which is obsolete, but not broken.
Man, the money's flying and I'm not even making anything yet. We'll probably wait on the breaker box and I'll do most of the plumbing myself. It pays to have a dad who's a handiman and I've learned a little by his side.
Either way, I missed this new Clinical Applications class. I don't even know what it's about. It just showed up on my schedule, and they sent out some email a day or two ago. Whatever.
Monday, September 25, 2006
Day 42: Back to the Grind
Today the joys of vacation ended and I hit the books again. Well, sorta. It sucked royally to get up today and know I had to go back to school. The weekend was basically spent veging. I watched lots of football, and slept, and generally basked in the glory that was no tests. It was great.
Most of my classmates went to The Lounge (a club) Friday night and got plastered. That's what most med students do--study and binge drink. Not healthy at all. You can translate it into hypertension and cirrhosis of the liver. And they're the one's that'll be telling you to get rid of some stress and stop downing the vodka...
Anyway, I don't drink, never have, and my wife isn't a big dancer, so my Friday was spent blissfully sleeping (in my bed this time, not the LRC). I hear the Lounge was fun, but I KNOW it was fun waking up after 20 hours of sleep. Great fun.
Today the Saints killed the Falcons 23-3 on Monday Night Football. It was the first homegame in the newly renovated Superdome. I watched the whole thing. I figured, what better reason to get behind immediately than to support the rebuilding of New Orleans...through football. People do need to get their acts together and finish it, because it's been a year and little's been accomplished. Someone would be fired if it wasn't the government.
Most of my classmates went to The Lounge (a club) Friday night and got plastered. That's what most med students do--study and binge drink. Not healthy at all. You can translate it into hypertension and cirrhosis of the liver. And they're the one's that'll be telling you to get rid of some stress and stop downing the vodka...
Anyway, I don't drink, never have, and my wife isn't a big dancer, so my Friday was spent blissfully sleeping (in my bed this time, not the LRC). I hear the Lounge was fun, but I KNOW it was fun waking up after 20 hours of sleep. Great fun.
Today the Saints killed the Falcons 23-3 on Monday Night Football. It was the first homegame in the newly renovated Superdome. I watched the whole thing. I figured, what better reason to get behind immediately than to support the rebuilding of New Orleans...through football. People do need to get their acts together and finish it, because it's been a year and little's been accomplished. Someone would be fired if it wasn't the government.
Friday, September 22, 2006
Day 39: It's Over!!
Devo's Done! That test was so short--only 40 questions. Yes, that means I can't miss much, but it also means I was done quickly. The best part about the exam was how straightforward it was. It didn't try to trick you. You either knew the material or you didn't.
Compare that with Biochem, which was a horribly written test. All it did was test your ability to understand obtuse language, not Biochem. I don't understand how some of the smartest professors in the world can write some of the stupidest tests. I think there needs to be education classes for professors. I know my undergraduate, BYU, had them, and those professors that went ALWAYS taught better than those who didn't.
Tonight I'm gonna sleep. Sleep, Sleep, Sleep, in MY bed...ah that sounds good.
Compare that with Biochem, which was a horribly written test. All it did was test your ability to understand obtuse language, not Biochem. I don't understand how some of the smartest professors in the world can write some of the stupidest tests. I think there needs to be education classes for professors. I know my undergraduate, BYU, had them, and those professors that went ALWAYS taught better than those who didn't.
Tonight I'm gonna sleep. Sleep, Sleep, Sleep, in MY bed...ah that sounds good.
Thursday, September 21, 2006
Day 38: Biochem Blues
Three practice tests. I took the old exams from 2003, 2004, 2005 and then walked the Green Mile. Failed. Oh it sucked.
Well, maybe not failed, but I missed at least 10 of 50. That's really my goal anyway--just pass. I haven't endured the rigor of a week like this in over a year and a half, and its killing me. Today's Biochem test was harder than the last three years. I just hope I pass.
My wife has been great. She's truly supportive and patient as I slept here last night and haven't really seen her for two weeks since I've left for school before she wakes up and get home after she's asleep.
Tomorrow's Devo and then it's all over. Now, if I can just cram enough into my head in 22 hours to pass...oh I wish the weekend were here already.
Well, maybe not failed, but I missed at least 10 of 50. That's really my goal anyway--just pass. I haven't endured the rigor of a week like this in over a year and a half, and its killing me. Today's Biochem test was harder than the last three years. I just hope I pass.
My wife has been great. She's truly supportive and patient as I slept here last night and haven't really seen her for two weeks since I've left for school before she wakes up and get home after she's asleep.
Tomorrow's Devo and then it's all over. Now, if I can just cram enough into my head in 22 hours to pass...oh I wish the weekend were here already.
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
Day 37: LRC campout
Things have gotten tough. School is killer. The Biochemistry final is tomorrow, and nobody's ready for it. I've studied non-stop since Histo got out, and what do I have to show for it? Pure caffeine coursing through my veins.
What has test week done to me?
I feel guilty going to the bathroom without taking notecards.
I fell guilty eating without a book in front of me.
I feel guilty driving home because I can't watch a videotape of a lecture.
I feel guilty sleeping because I'm not studying.
Tonight I'm not going home. Not pulling an all-nighter--I'm far too tired to do that, and I have Developmental Anatomy the day after Biochem. I don't wanna crash. Nope, I'm just sleeping in the LRC. My lovely wife brought me dinner, breakfast, a pillow, and a blanket. I'm studying until two, sleeping until six, and back to studying until the biochem test.
What has test week done to me?
I feel guilty going to the bathroom without taking notecards.
I fell guilty eating without a book in front of me.
I feel guilty driving home because I can't watch a videotape of a lecture.
I feel guilty sleeping because I'm not studying.
Tonight I'm not going home. Not pulling an all-nighter--I'm far too tired to do that, and I have Developmental Anatomy the day after Biochem. I don't wanna crash. Nope, I'm just sleeping in the LRC. My lovely wife brought me dinner, breakfast, a pillow, and a blanket. I'm studying until two, sleeping until six, and back to studying until the biochem test.
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Day 36: Histology Horror
Well, Histology is over. Done. I'm miserable. This week has been rotten. One of the worst weeks of my life. I have almost never felt as depressed as I do right now. It's this general feeling of sadness, like Eeyore from Winnie the Pooh.
"Oh, Bother..."
Sometimes, in my fleeting moments of resilience, I steel my mind, pull up my britches, and tell myself I can persevere. I am good enough to be a doctor. Then I get back to studying and I feel as if the world is collapsing all around me. I've never felt so alone, so tired, so sad, so angry, so frustrated.
I have such great friends around me, trying to pump me up. They keep saying "don't worry! Everyone's in the same boat." Or, "hey, this is the first exam. Now you'll know how to study. You've still got 75% of your grade to go." I'm so thankful that they're here to help me along, but the reality is, I still suck.
Sometimes I wonder if I have a learning disability. Then, in my next thought, I tell myself that would be a cop-out, since I am having trouble focusing, and I feel like I must reread things a billion times before they stick. It shouldn't be a cop-out, because learning disabilities are real things that real people struggle with and, if anything, those people should be lauded for dealing with and overcoming their trials. But I still have that thought, and I get depressed. Some psychiatrist lady here told everyone at orientation that many people in medical school get diagnosed with learning disorders. They were always so smart that they just covered it up. Nobody noticed because their grades were high. But once you get here, everything gets manifest.
Regardless, I haven't been blogging because I've spent so much time studying, and I'm realizing as I write this how therapeutic blogging is to me. I'm gonna have to go back and fill in what's gone on between now and 5 September 2006.
"Oh, Bother..."
Sometimes, in my fleeting moments of resilience, I steel my mind, pull up my britches, and tell myself I can persevere. I am good enough to be a doctor. Then I get back to studying and I feel as if the world is collapsing all around me. I've never felt so alone, so tired, so sad, so angry, so frustrated.
I have such great friends around me, trying to pump me up. They keep saying "don't worry! Everyone's in the same boat." Or, "hey, this is the first exam. Now you'll know how to study. You've still got 75% of your grade to go." I'm so thankful that they're here to help me along, but the reality is, I still suck.
Sometimes I wonder if I have a learning disability. Then, in my next thought, I tell myself that would be a cop-out, since I am having trouble focusing, and I feel like I must reread things a billion times before they stick. It shouldn't be a cop-out, because learning disabilities are real things that real people struggle with and, if anything, those people should be lauded for dealing with and overcoming their trials. But I still have that thought, and I get depressed. Some psychiatrist lady here told everyone at orientation that many people in medical school get diagnosed with learning disorders. They were always so smart that they just covered it up. Nobody noticed because their grades were high. But once you get here, everything gets manifest.
Regardless, I haven't been blogging because I've spent so much time studying, and I'm realizing as I write this how therapeutic blogging is to me. I'm gonna have to go back and fill in what's gone on between now and 5 September 2006.
Monday, September 18, 2006
Day 35: First Block Exams
Today sucked. I've never felt so overwhelmed in my life. I now realize what I've been going through--finals. At BYU, I had to study. I was not the smartest kid, although if you ask my mom, there's nobody smarter. But that's a good mom talking. Especially my freshman and senior years. I took hard classes. I was a glutton for punishment because I wanted the good professors even if my grades were lower ... and they were. Plus, it was tough doing school while getting married. But that's no excuse.
I studied hard, but rarely did I feel overwhelmed, especially because BYU has a testing center. Example: a biochemistry test would be put in the testing center from monday through thursday. Then, based on how prepared I felt, and what was going on in my other classes, I could take the exam any day I wanted morning or night (well, until 10pm). Such flexibility was a blessing I do not have anymore.
Studying for these first tests has truly been like finals. Finals at BYU were not flexible, and with all my hard classes, made me miss a lot of sleep and subsist on caffeine. The pressure, hours, and material here in this first round of tests is equivalent to a finals week. That makes me fear what finals week here will be like.
*shudder*
it doesn't help the fact that I bombed my anatomy test. It was so tough. I knew the practical, knew it, but drew blanks. Ugh. Alright, just 18 hours until Histology...
I studied hard, but rarely did I feel overwhelmed, especially because BYU has a testing center. Example: a biochemistry test would be put in the testing center from monday through thursday. Then, based on how prepared I felt, and what was going on in my other classes, I could take the exam any day I wanted morning or night (well, until 10pm). Such flexibility was a blessing I do not have anymore.
Studying for these first tests has truly been like finals. Finals at BYU were not flexible, and with all my hard classes, made me miss a lot of sleep and subsist on caffeine. The pressure, hours, and material here in this first round of tests is equivalent to a finals week. That makes me fear what finals week here will be like.
*shudder*
it doesn't help the fact that I bombed my anatomy test. It was so tough. I knew the practical, knew it, but drew blanks. Ugh. Alright, just 18 hours until Histology...
Sunday, September 17, 2006
Day 34: Sunday School
I typically don't write on days that aren't involved with school, but since finals (I mean first round of exams) are tomorrow, today is applicable. Applicable because of what I couldn't do--study.
I am a church-going guy. My wife and I currently help out in the Vietnamese branch (congregation) downtown. We don't technically belong to that area, but we know most of the members, and we both speak Vietnamese, that we felt we could help out a small branch.
Anyway, I got asked two Sundays ago to teach Sunday School today and next Sunday. I said yes, not realizing what finals were going to be like. So, here I am, teaching about Paul's second missionary journey, preparing for it, going to church, home from church, etc...you get the picture. Study time on Sunday? All of about 4 hours--from 7pm to 11pm. By then I was shot, having spent my morning preparing my lesson and being in church from 2pm to 6:30pm (counting driving time). Two of those hours were histology and two were gross anatomy.
I'm scared.
I am a church-going guy. My wife and I currently help out in the Vietnamese branch (congregation) downtown. We don't technically belong to that area, but we know most of the members, and we both speak Vietnamese, that we felt we could help out a small branch.
Anyway, I got asked two Sundays ago to teach Sunday School today and next Sunday. I said yes, not realizing what finals were going to be like. So, here I am, teaching about Paul's second missionary journey, preparing for it, going to church, home from church, etc...you get the picture. Study time on Sunday? All of about 4 hours--from 7pm to 11pm. By then I was shot, having spent my morning preparing my lesson and being in church from 2pm to 6:30pm (counting driving time). Two of those hours were histology and two were gross anatomy.
I'm scared.
Saturday, September 16, 2006
Day 33: Gross Day
The marathon studying continues. I got up to school today by 8am, and was one of only five or so people in the gross lab. I left at 4:30pm, after reviewing five or six cadavers by myself, a couple with two classmates, Veronica and Adrianna, and hearing the amazing Dr. Zhang do his thing (a full review). My head hurts so I think I'm gonna switch to Histology for a bit.
I'll go home from the LRC (learning resource center) about midnight, because I have to teach Sunday School tomorrow at church. That'll be a good 16 hours studying. You truly can't understand medical school until you go. People have no idea the stress you endure or how hard it is.
I'll go home from the LRC (learning resource center) about midnight, because I have to teach Sunday School tomorrow at church. That'll be a good 16 hours studying. You truly can't understand medical school until you go. People have no idea the stress you endure or how hard it is.
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
Day 30: Gay Doctors
I've been thinking about this some more. What about gay doctors? This was my question that i asked Dr. Bockmon directly. You see, when a male doctor examines the genitalia of a female patient, a third person accompanies him into the exam room (usually a female nurse). This is smart, because it can put the patient at ease and protect the doc from sexual harrassment litigation. But in medicine, there is a BIG double standard. Female doctors often do not have to take a third person in the exam room when examining male patients' genitalia. More than that, sexual persuasion is never asked (of the doctor) in the hospital/clinic, so a gay doctor could be examining a male patient without a third person in the room. Do I think that gay doctors are going to molest patients? Heck no. They're not any more likely to do it than straight doctors. My point is, for those women who feel awkward having a male doctor give them a pelvic exam, there are doubtless people who would feel just as awkward having a homosexual doctor of their same gender giving them an exam. There is a simple, fair, equitable, and respectable answer to this. Give everyone their privacy by requiring a third person in the exam room every time a physician gives a genital exam regardless of the gender of physician or patient. Then people can keep their personal lives personal, and hospitals/physicians can be better covered against sexual harrasment litigation.
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
Day 29: Treating Gay Patients
Today, I took time out from the studying to attend the "Cultural Humility Series" lecture on "Treating Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Patients." I love this cultural humility class thing. We get "blue book" credit for going to a certain percentage of them, but even without that, I'd still go. Why? Because it gets me to constantly reevaluate and assess my existence.
Last week's topic on Southeast Asian patients was interesting because I am so intimately involved with the Vietnamese population here and in Vietnam. Today was a different kind of interesting.
Honestly, I've never thought about homosexual patients, or doctors for that matter. It's never crossed my mind. I just lived my life, day after day, not thinking that there could be issues regarding sexuality, besides your doc asking "are you sexually active?"
Dr. Bockmon gave a good seminar on the issues that GLBT patients deal with and what physicians who treat them deal with. I did not care for the loads of time he spent trying to tell us why people are gay.
You see, I'm a Mormon. I come from a pretty conservative christian church. I have personal religious beliefs that deal with sexuality of all forms. Naturally, as we've all seen in the public forum debates today, people's beliefs run head-on into each other when discussing homosexuality, specifically homosexual marriage.
How should I feel about this issue, as a person? As a doctor? Religiously, I believe that there is a God, who is our spiritual father, and he's given us commandments. If we follow them, we are worthy to return and live with him forever. Most of these commandments deal with controlling the natural body -- putting the spirit in charge -- and ordering society. "Thou shalt have no other god before me..." etc. One of God's big commandments, is "Thou shalt not commit adultery." It's obviously elaborated further in the scriptures, but I believe that a person should abstain from sexual activities (not just intercourse, but felatio, etc.) until marriage, and should be monogamous after. Marriage is defined in the scriptures as a man and a woman. So I have a deep religious belief that homosexuals are breaking this commandment. It's a religious belief, and I do not feel any need to change it or apologize because the prevaling social norms are different.
Nevertheless, I live in a country where nobody is allowed to impose their beliefs on others. So I cannot stand on my horse and judge or meet out judgement on homosexuals because I feel they are breaking God's law. God, Himself, says that we should treat everyone with love and be subject to the laws of the land. As a doctor, I am required (and would feel awkward doing otherwise) to put aside my personal feelings about anyone, whether it be race, sexuality, religion, creed, gender, etc. and make sure that patient gets the best possible heathcare. I feel extremely strong on this point. No matter what my personal beliefs are on homosexuality and eternal salvation, there is no question about homosexuality and temporal healthcare. Everyone gets the same healthcare. I do my best for all.
I liked that about the talk. It was very eye opening. But then the question was asked, should physicians be required to treat LGBT patients (or any patient for that matter)? This gave me fits for quite awhile, but I think I've decided NO. The physician-patient relationship is special, because it is so contractual, yet the employee is the boss of the employer. Technically, the patient walking into my office is the boss. He or she decides to spend his or her hard-earned money on me, to achieve the outcome (better health, bigger boobs, etc.). However, part of that contract is that the patient basically relinquishes power to the doctor because the doctor has the knowledge and expertise. You let a lawyer draw up merger plans for your company because you have no clue how to do so. Same thing with a doctor, only the outcome of this "merger" really is life or death.
So, being a contractual relationship, I think the doctor has the right to say, no, I don't want to treat such and such patient, no reason necessary. On the other hand, a patient has the right to choose whatever doctor he or she thinks is best for him or her, even mid-treatment. Now, caveats. Today's HMO/PPO junk has limited the number of doctors people can see, true, but there are still many doctors out there so I don't think this is a valid argument against my point. The other caveat is that a doctor is oath-bound to save lives, and if there is not a reasonable alternative, I don't think any doctor can ethically turn away any patient.
Example: if you're the only doctor in a small town, you can't turn away townsfolk who have nobody else to go to. Or, if you come across a motor vehicle accident, you cannot ethically excuse yourself from giving aid to hurt passengers. But for standard, walk in patients with cuts, bruises, viruses, or chronic diseases, where there are other alternatives available, I think a physician is well within his or her right to refuse services just as a patient can stop services that he or she deems unneccesary or ineffective.
Last week's topic on Southeast Asian patients was interesting because I am so intimately involved with the Vietnamese population here and in Vietnam. Today was a different kind of interesting.
Honestly, I've never thought about homosexual patients, or doctors for that matter. It's never crossed my mind. I just lived my life, day after day, not thinking that there could be issues regarding sexuality, besides your doc asking "are you sexually active?"
Dr. Bockmon gave a good seminar on the issues that GLBT patients deal with and what physicians who treat them deal with. I did not care for the loads of time he spent trying to tell us why people are gay.
You see, I'm a Mormon. I come from a pretty conservative christian church. I have personal religious beliefs that deal with sexuality of all forms. Naturally, as we've all seen in the public forum debates today, people's beliefs run head-on into each other when discussing homosexuality, specifically homosexual marriage.
How should I feel about this issue, as a person? As a doctor? Religiously, I believe that there is a God, who is our spiritual father, and he's given us commandments. If we follow them, we are worthy to return and live with him forever. Most of these commandments deal with controlling the natural body -- putting the spirit in charge -- and ordering society. "Thou shalt have no other god before me..." etc. One of God's big commandments, is "Thou shalt not commit adultery." It's obviously elaborated further in the scriptures, but I believe that a person should abstain from sexual activities (not just intercourse, but felatio, etc.) until marriage, and should be monogamous after. Marriage is defined in the scriptures as a man and a woman. So I have a deep religious belief that homosexuals are breaking this commandment. It's a religious belief, and I do not feel any need to change it or apologize because the prevaling social norms are different.
Nevertheless, I live in a country where nobody is allowed to impose their beliefs on others. So I cannot stand on my horse and judge or meet out judgement on homosexuals because I feel they are breaking God's law. God, Himself, says that we should treat everyone with love and be subject to the laws of the land. As a doctor, I am required (and would feel awkward doing otherwise) to put aside my personal feelings about anyone, whether it be race, sexuality, religion, creed, gender, etc. and make sure that patient gets the best possible heathcare. I feel extremely strong on this point. No matter what my personal beliefs are on homosexuality and eternal salvation, there is no question about homosexuality and temporal healthcare. Everyone gets the same healthcare. I do my best for all.
I liked that about the talk. It was very eye opening. But then the question was asked, should physicians be required to treat LGBT patients (or any patient for that matter)? This gave me fits for quite awhile, but I think I've decided NO. The physician-patient relationship is special, because it is so contractual, yet the employee is the boss of the employer. Technically, the patient walking into my office is the boss. He or she decides to spend his or her hard-earned money on me, to achieve the outcome (better health, bigger boobs, etc.). However, part of that contract is that the patient basically relinquishes power to the doctor because the doctor has the knowledge and expertise. You let a lawyer draw up merger plans for your company because you have no clue how to do so. Same thing with a doctor, only the outcome of this "merger" really is life or death.
So, being a contractual relationship, I think the doctor has the right to say, no, I don't want to treat such and such patient, no reason necessary. On the other hand, a patient has the right to choose whatever doctor he or she thinks is best for him or her, even mid-treatment. Now, caveats. Today's HMO/PPO junk has limited the number of doctors people can see, true, but there are still many doctors out there so I don't think this is a valid argument against my point. The other caveat is that a doctor is oath-bound to save lives, and if there is not a reasonable alternative, I don't think any doctor can ethically turn away any patient.
Example: if you're the only doctor in a small town, you can't turn away townsfolk who have nobody else to go to. Or, if you come across a motor vehicle accident, you cannot ethically excuse yourself from giving aid to hurt passengers. But for standard, walk in patients with cuts, bruises, viruses, or chronic diseases, where there are other alternatives available, I think a physician is well within his or her right to refuse services just as a patient can stop services that he or she deems unneccesary or ineffective.
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
Day 23: U-pass Trauma
Today was a horrible day. I awoke early, drove fast, and arrived at school at 6:33am to get my U-pass. Remember, the place doesn't start selling them until 8:00am. I was the third person in line, behind a nursing student and a dental hygienist student who brought CHAIRS. Yes, chairs.
It didn't matter though. I looked down for my badge and my heart sunk into my jejunum when I realized I left it on the night stand by my bed. I live a freaking 45 minutes away in NO TRAFFIC. Rush hour? Forget it.
So I called my loving wife, and then my best friend Jamie. He hadn't left for work yet, so she ran it over to him. However, then my mom awoke (remember, still staying with the folks, bidding on condos) and she and Thi decided to run it down to me (faster). So they got ahold of Jamie, and the three of them plus another guy from the park and ride flew down the HOV lane towards downtown.
I gave up my place in line and watched vainly as person after person got their U-pass. They had 1107 passes, and I mentally ticked them all down. At 8:30am, 2 hours after I realized my bone-headed mistake, Thi walked in holding my badge.
Could I get my U-pass now? No. I have to go upstairs to the 22nd floor and get a dumb little sticker that says I paid tuition. Why they couldn't have sent it to me when I paid my tuition, or given it to me at orientation, I dunno. Red Tape is my least favorite color of tape.
So I got that, went back down to the first floor, paid my $52, and walked out with my little, blue U-pass. My mom and Thi raced home so she could change for a job interview (she made it on time) and I went to class late and eternally grateful to everyone.
And I'm supposed to be smart enough to be a doctor? I can't even remember my badge.
It didn't matter though. I looked down for my badge and my heart sunk into my jejunum when I realized I left it on the night stand by my bed. I live a freaking 45 minutes away in NO TRAFFIC. Rush hour? Forget it.
So I called my loving wife, and then my best friend Jamie. He hadn't left for work yet, so she ran it over to him. However, then my mom awoke (remember, still staying with the folks, bidding on condos) and she and Thi decided to run it down to me (faster). So they got ahold of Jamie, and the three of them plus another guy from the park and ride flew down the HOV lane towards downtown.
I gave up my place in line and watched vainly as person after person got their U-pass. They had 1107 passes, and I mentally ticked them all down. At 8:30am, 2 hours after I realized my bone-headed mistake, Thi walked in holding my badge.
Could I get my U-pass now? No. I have to go upstairs to the 22nd floor and get a dumb little sticker that says I paid tuition. Why they couldn't have sent it to me when I paid my tuition, or given it to me at orientation, I dunno. Red Tape is my least favorite color of tape.
So I got that, went back down to the first floor, paid my $52, and walked out with my little, blue U-pass. My mom and Thi raced home so she could change for a job interview (she made it on time) and I went to class late and eternally grateful to everyone.
And I'm supposed to be smart enough to be a doctor? I can't even remember my badge.
Monday, September 04, 2006
Day 22: Labor Day
How was everyone's Labor Day? Anything amazing or fun? I spent all day studying at Barnes & Noble. Yep, studied Devo (Developmental Anatomy). I hate that class. I will never be an OB/GYN.
I've consigned myself to the reality that I will never get a real holiday. When people are playing, I will be studying. The day after exams, I will play, and everyone else will work.
Yea.
I've consigned myself to the reality that I will never get a real holiday. When people are playing, I will be studying. The day after exams, I will play, and everyone else will work.
Yea.
Saturday, September 02, 2006
Day 20: Gross Saturday
I've decided that six-day study weeks are mandatory for passing in medical school. Not to get ahead, but to stay afloat. Today I had a great Gross Anatomy study day with Dung studying the neck. Man, that boy's got a memory. I wish I had a mind like his.
Also, we're bidding on a condo. Maybe, just maybe, by the second block, I'll be in my own place down close to school.
Also, we're bidding on a condo. Maybe, just maybe, by the second block, I'll be in my own place down close to school.
Friday, September 01, 2006
Day 19: Practicing Skillz
Today was my first Introduction to Clinical Medicine (ICM) practice day. There's this section of the school that was built to look like doctors' offices, and my class is split into groups of 20 or so who go on a specified day to practice our skills ... or lack thereof.
Today I got paired with a very beautiful and nice girl named Megan. One of the best attributes a doctor can have is a warm, heartfelt smile, and she has an award-winning one. In my opinion, this is very important because often a patient has no relationship with his or her doctor, but is supposed to open up and share what's wrong. A warm smile can help bridge that unfamiliarity gap quickly, which will allow the patient to be more expressive and help the doctor make a quicker, more accurate diagnosis.
Our patient was a girl named Jenny. A good looking nursing student who runs a lot. This was wonderful because we walked in and didn't know what to do. Well, Megan was on the ball, but I was a fool. I knew what to do, but not how to do it ... and that's ok. That's what the practice session is for. Jenny helped walk us through how to feel radial, brachial, and ulnar pulses, take blood pressure, and count respiratory rates.
The first time I did it, I got a good bp, something like 110/70 (ish) and thought I was doing good (except I wasn't sure if I was hearing the right stuff). The second time I got something like 100/60 and thought that was low, but Jenny just laughed and said it's high, because she's a runner.
So all y'all watch out!! I'll overestimate your blood pressure!!
Let's just wait for next time--it's heart and lung stuff.
Today I got paired with a very beautiful and nice girl named Megan. One of the best attributes a doctor can have is a warm, heartfelt smile, and she has an award-winning one. In my opinion, this is very important because often a patient has no relationship with his or her doctor, but is supposed to open up and share what's wrong. A warm smile can help bridge that unfamiliarity gap quickly, which will allow the patient to be more expressive and help the doctor make a quicker, more accurate diagnosis.
Our patient was a girl named Jenny. A good looking nursing student who runs a lot. This was wonderful because we walked in and didn't know what to do. Well, Megan was on the ball, but I was a fool. I knew what to do, but not how to do it ... and that's ok. That's what the practice session is for. Jenny helped walk us through how to feel radial, brachial, and ulnar pulses, take blood pressure, and count respiratory rates.
The first time I did it, I got a good bp, something like 110/70 (ish) and thought I was doing good (except I wasn't sure if I was hearing the right stuff). The second time I got something like 100/60 and thought that was low, but Jenny just laughed and said it's high, because she's a runner.
So all y'all watch out!! I'll overestimate your blood pressure!!
Let's just wait for next time--it's heart and lung stuff.
Thursday, August 31, 2006
Day 18: U-pass
Today i found out that they're finally selling the U-pass. It'll be available Tuesday morning, at 8:00am. Why is this important? Because they're selling U-passes for only $52. A U-pass is a year long bus pass that allows unlimited rides for one year on the Harris County Metro system. Typically, these things go for mucho denaro, ala $400 bucks or so. $52 is one buck a week, for unlimited rides. Can't beat it. You can bet I'll be first in line.
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
Day 17: More bus news
Today we did the Gross lab on the posterior triangle of the neck. For those of you who have no clue what that is, relish in your ignorance. It truly is bliss. Mainly that's because the platysma muscle should just freaking die. All it does it stretch your neck. Heck, I'll take a cool palmaris longus muscle over platysma any day. At least then I get claws.
But yesterday, I didn't write about my bus experience, so although this is day 17, the experience happened on day 16. Sue me.
I got on the bus late, because I was dead tired after doing condo-hunting junk all night, and started transfering phone numbers from my old cell phone to my new one (I just jumped ship from Sprint to T-mobile and got a Motorola Razor ... although I think my wife's Samsung T509 is much better) when I saw a young Vietnamese girl hop on the bus at the last second. Since I was catching the later bus, it was already "standing room only" since everyone seems to like to ride it at 7:00am. I thought "man, she looks familiar" but I couldn't place her.
Of course, I've lived in 'Nam, and I've seen so many Viet faces that lots of people start to look familiar. We used to call it the "Cannon Center face" at BYU because you have no clue who the person is, never talked to them, but you see them every day because you eat at the same location (or work, etc.) so you nod at each other in recognition of your mutual existence as you pass each other wordlessly yet again. I know you all know what I'm talking about.
As I near my stop, the Viet girl turns to me and says, "Excuse me, but you look familiar. Have I met you before?" Smiling, I replied "Well, I was just thinking the same thing. My name's Minh Triet."
"Spencer!" she screams. It turned out to be my friend Anh, who I last saw a year and a half ago. She and I had gotten to know each other briefly two years ago, but after a couple months I headed out to school. Last I heard, she was studying at HCC and thinking of accounting.
It turns out she's at the med center studying nursing at TWU. We chatted up a storm in Vietnamese until my stop came, everyone around us staring in shock that some white guy was ripping off fluent Vietnamese on a bus, swapped numbers and headed to our respective schools.
See all the cool experiences you can have on the bus? Busses rock.
But yesterday, I didn't write about my bus experience, so although this is day 17, the experience happened on day 16. Sue me.
I got on the bus late, because I was dead tired after doing condo-hunting junk all night, and started transfering phone numbers from my old cell phone to my new one (I just jumped ship from Sprint to T-mobile and got a Motorola Razor ... although I think my wife's Samsung T509 is much better) when I saw a young Vietnamese girl hop on the bus at the last second. Since I was catching the later bus, it was already "standing room only" since everyone seems to like to ride it at 7:00am. I thought "man, she looks familiar" but I couldn't place her.
Of course, I've lived in 'Nam, and I've seen so many Viet faces that lots of people start to look familiar. We used to call it the "Cannon Center face" at BYU because you have no clue who the person is, never talked to them, but you see them every day because you eat at the same location (or work, etc.) so you nod at each other in recognition of your mutual existence as you pass each other wordlessly yet again. I know you all know what I'm talking about.
As I near my stop, the Viet girl turns to me and says, "Excuse me, but you look familiar. Have I met you before?" Smiling, I replied "Well, I was just thinking the same thing. My name's Minh Triet."
"Spencer!" she screams. It turned out to be my friend Anh, who I last saw a year and a half ago. She and I had gotten to know each other briefly two years ago, but after a couple months I headed out to school. Last I heard, she was studying at HCC and thinking of accounting.
It turns out she's at the med center studying nursing at TWU. We chatted up a storm in Vietnamese until my stop came, everyone around us staring in shock that some white guy was ripping off fluent Vietnamese on a bus, swapped numbers and headed to our respective schools.
See all the cool experiences you can have on the bus? Busses rock.
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
Day 16: Gross Anatomy Practice Practical
Today, from 4:00-5:00pm, Gross Anatomy had a practice practical. It was set up by the second year pedagogues because we MS1s have no clue what a practical will be like, and we're now half-way through the five-week first block. The scary part is that for everything we've learned (or were supposed to have learned) up until now, it's only half of what's on the first-block exams, and one-sixth of what's required in the course.
The practical was 27 questions. Well, it was 27 body parts tagged with pins and arrows, asking, "What the heck is this? Oh, you don't know? Well, sucks to be you. Actually it's just your finger, but it's put in a position that makes you think it's your appendix."
The practical was really helpful and I'm greatful I got one. I learned two things:
Alright, no rest for the weary. Tomorrow starts the neck, taught by the amazing Dr. Zhang.
The practical was 27 questions. Well, it was 27 body parts tagged with pins and arrows, asking, "What the heck is this? Oh, you don't know? Well, sucks to be you. Actually it's just your finger, but it's put in a position that makes you think it's your appendix."
The practical was really helpful and I'm greatful I got one. I learned two things:
- There's a lot I don't know
- There's a lot I do know, but can't translate from Netter or my cadaver to other cadavers in not-so-perfect positions
Alright, no rest for the weary. Tomorrow starts the neck, taught by the amazing Dr. Zhang.
Monday, August 28, 2006
Day 15: Mondays
Mondays suck. Today was the first good monday I've had in a while. Why? Because some sweet soul decided to schedule no classes until 10:00am. Soooo nice. What that really means is no pressure to get up freaking early to get on a bus to sit through a class I don't want to be in. Nobody likes Mondays. They should just get rid of them.
Except that would make Tuesday the new Monday, and the vicious cycle would start over again.
Except that would make Tuesday the new Monday, and the vicious cycle would start over again.
Saturday, August 26, 2006
Day 13: The Zhang Train
Every Saturday, the MS1s do an interesting little dance called the Zhang Train. I did it today. It basically entails cramming around the professor-prosected cadaver while Dr. Zhang reviews the disections of the past week. Then, after he's done numerous rounds of that, he moves from cadaver to cadaver answering questions and curious students form a train following him everywhere he goes.
The man is amazing. He grew up and went to school in China. He studied western medicine, but he says every doctor is required to study 400 hours of chinese medicine too. Back then, medical school was five years, and the first two years were horrible--deadly. Now, things have eased up. China is starting to follow an American path. Students go to undergraduate institutions for four years and medical school for four years.
Since he first graduated medical school and started work as a general surgeon he has taught Gross Anatomy. He says it is the best way for a surgeon to become good and proficient. Teaching Gross Anatomy for two or three years makes you memorize everything in the body, and makes you a much better surgeon.
Example: You need to do an appendectomy. Many surgeons will open up the abdomen and will not be able to find the appendix because it can turn on itself and hide in the intestinal wall. However, with a supreme knowledge of Gross Anatomy, Dr. Zhang has put many pompous young surgeons in their place as he deftly pointed out where the invisible structure was hiding.
The man is amazing. He was an accomplished surgeon in China, but came here for his children. However, he cannot practice medicine in America. America requires that he take all the licensing exams (like I will do) and go through residency again.
"The licensing exams I can handle," he said, "but residency ... so many nights on call ... (laughing) I'm too old for that."
His skills are peerless. He can find any structure, nerve, artery, etc. in under 30 seconds. He cleans up the most MS1-messed-up area so fast and well that it looks like an MS1 never touched it.
Mixing western and eastern skill, he told us today of how Chinese surgeons, when working on the thyroid, would not use anesthesia. Instead, they would insert one accupuncture needle laterally and medially in the neck, into a cutaneous nerve. Why would it numb the whole neck? He doesn't know, but it works. They do it all the time. That way, when they are working in the neck, they can talk to the patient. There are many nerves running through it, and as they work, they monitor the patient's voice. If it changes up or down, they know they are near a nerve, but still have time to move around it and not sever it. Conversely, western doctors give the patient gas and knock him or her out. They perform the surgery and cannot tell if a nerve is accidentally nicked until after the patient wakes up.
His heart is gold. He doesn't have to come in on Saturdays. Every other professor goes home. But Zhang, every fall, spends four or five hours a Saturday in the Gross Lab reviewing and teaching hungry, eager students because he loves it. He loves teaching and he loves medicine. He loves passing along thirty years of teaching Gross Anatomy to those wet-behind-the-ears.
That is the one and only Amazing Dr. Zhang.
The man is amazing. He grew up and went to school in China. He studied western medicine, but he says every doctor is required to study 400 hours of chinese medicine too. Back then, medical school was five years, and the first two years were horrible--deadly. Now, things have eased up. China is starting to follow an American path. Students go to undergraduate institutions for four years and medical school for four years.
Since he first graduated medical school and started work as a general surgeon he has taught Gross Anatomy. He says it is the best way for a surgeon to become good and proficient. Teaching Gross Anatomy for two or three years makes you memorize everything in the body, and makes you a much better surgeon.
Example: You need to do an appendectomy. Many surgeons will open up the abdomen and will not be able to find the appendix because it can turn on itself and hide in the intestinal wall. However, with a supreme knowledge of Gross Anatomy, Dr. Zhang has put many pompous young surgeons in their place as he deftly pointed out where the invisible structure was hiding.
The man is amazing. He was an accomplished surgeon in China, but came here for his children. However, he cannot practice medicine in America. America requires that he take all the licensing exams (like I will do) and go through residency again.
"The licensing exams I can handle," he said, "but residency ... so many nights on call ... (laughing) I'm too old for that."
His skills are peerless. He can find any structure, nerve, artery, etc. in under 30 seconds. He cleans up the most MS1-messed-up area so fast and well that it looks like an MS1 never touched it.
Mixing western and eastern skill, he told us today of how Chinese surgeons, when working on the thyroid, would not use anesthesia. Instead, they would insert one accupuncture needle laterally and medially in the neck, into a cutaneous nerve. Why would it numb the whole neck? He doesn't know, but it works. They do it all the time. That way, when they are working in the neck, they can talk to the patient. There are many nerves running through it, and as they work, they monitor the patient's voice. If it changes up or down, they know they are near a nerve, but still have time to move around it and not sever it. Conversely, western doctors give the patient gas and knock him or her out. They perform the surgery and cannot tell if a nerve is accidentally nicked until after the patient wakes up.
His heart is gold. He doesn't have to come in on Saturdays. Every other professor goes home. But Zhang, every fall, spends four or five hours a Saturday in the Gross Lab reviewing and teaching hungry, eager students because he loves it. He loves teaching and he loves medicine. He loves passing along thirty years of teaching Gross Anatomy to those wet-behind-the-ears.
That is the one and only Amazing Dr. Zhang.
Friday, August 25, 2006
Day 12: Moroccan Generosity
Friday. Gross lab. Five hours disecting the anterior forearm and palm ... and I was in a fast group. Some people took 6 and a half, some are coming back tomorrow. There are so many nerves and arteries and muscles in the forearm and hand, not to mention the axillary space with the brachial plexus (which was two days ago), that my head hurts, and I am TIRED.
So, after lab I ran to the LRC, checked the bus times, and rounded up my stuff. I had to hurry to make the 298 at 5:45pm. Walking quickly to the corner, I met a short, wavy haired woman also walking briskly towards the bus stop on the other side of the street.
"I missed my bus," she said. "I always take the 5:30 but I'm late. I hope I didn't miss the next one."
I smiled politely at her.
"I was so busy today," she continued of her own accord. "I'm going on vacation and had to finish up and now I'm late."
"Well," I finally replied, "I think you're ok. There should be another bus."
"Yes. I saw that one just pass by. I'm just hoping that wasn't it."
"Me too," I concurred.
The light turned green and the little white figure of a walking man appeared. Crossing the street, I looked right and saw two busses making their way towards our stop.
"Well, one of those should be ours ... I can't see the numbers ... ah, yep! That first one is the 298," I said.
As we merged into the fast forming line, she turned to me quickly and said "Do you have any money?" I flashed her my blue pass that my father gave me the week before. It has a stored amount of cash on it which is depleted a little every time I ride a bus.
"How much is the bus?" she queried.
"Three dollars a time," was my response.
We boarded the bus, I got my transfer, and moved down the aisle. The bus was nearly empty. The talkative woman sat by the window on a row, but I, smelling like Gross Lab, chose to sit in the aisle seat of the open row behind her so as to spare her a stench-filled ride.
Within seconds she turned to me and said,
"So I'm going on vacation. I'm going for a whole month. Take this." And with that she gave me her red bus card. "It's good until September 2nd," she continued. "I'm going on vacation for a whole month so I won't need it."
Flabbergasted, I asked "Well, don't you need it when you get back?"
"No," she replied. "It's only good for one month. I'll buy a new one when I get back. But it's only good until September 2nd."
Still in shock, I said thank you and humbly leaned back in my chair to inspect my newly received prize. It was a red zone 4 card, worth $110 a month, which gives the bearer unlimited rides on busses during the month.
After a minute or so, I struck up a conversation with the lady. She's from Morocco, heading back for a month-long vacation to see family. She works as a lab manager for Baylor College of Medicine. She's a very nice lady.
It's amazing all the types of people in this world. I love riding busses because you get to meet many of them. More than if you shut yourself up in your car. Almost all my experiences on busses have been more than favorable. People that want to be alone sit quietly, but often, there's a very nice person on the bus who wants to chat, and for a second you're like a passerby, given the chance to look into the window of a house whose curtains are usually drawn, and glimpse the story unfolding within. The bus ride ends, the drapes close, and you walk away enriched by what you experienced. And maybe you'll get a red card too.
So, after lab I ran to the LRC, checked the bus times, and rounded up my stuff. I had to hurry to make the 298 at 5:45pm. Walking quickly to the corner, I met a short, wavy haired woman also walking briskly towards the bus stop on the other side of the street.
"I missed my bus," she said. "I always take the 5:30 but I'm late. I hope I didn't miss the next one."
I smiled politely at her.
"I was so busy today," she continued of her own accord. "I'm going on vacation and had to finish up and now I'm late."
"Well," I finally replied, "I think you're ok. There should be another bus."
"Yes. I saw that one just pass by. I'm just hoping that wasn't it."
"Me too," I concurred.
The light turned green and the little white figure of a walking man appeared. Crossing the street, I looked right and saw two busses making their way towards our stop.
"Well, one of those should be ours ... I can't see the numbers ... ah, yep! That first one is the 298," I said.
As we merged into the fast forming line, she turned to me quickly and said "Do you have any money?" I flashed her my blue pass that my father gave me the week before. It has a stored amount of cash on it which is depleted a little every time I ride a bus.
"How much is the bus?" she queried.
"Three dollars a time," was my response.
We boarded the bus, I got my transfer, and moved down the aisle. The bus was nearly empty. The talkative woman sat by the window on a row, but I, smelling like Gross Lab, chose to sit in the aisle seat of the open row behind her so as to spare her a stench-filled ride.
Within seconds she turned to me and said,
"So I'm going on vacation. I'm going for a whole month. Take this." And with that she gave me her red bus card. "It's good until September 2nd," she continued. "I'm going on vacation for a whole month so I won't need it."
Flabbergasted, I asked "Well, don't you need it when you get back?"
"No," she replied. "It's only good for one month. I'll buy a new one when I get back. But it's only good until September 2nd."
Still in shock, I said thank you and humbly leaned back in my chair to inspect my newly received prize. It was a red zone 4 card, worth $110 a month, which gives the bearer unlimited rides on busses during the month.
After a minute or so, I struck up a conversation with the lady. She's from Morocco, heading back for a month-long vacation to see family. She works as a lab manager for Baylor College of Medicine. She's a very nice lady.
It's amazing all the types of people in this world. I love riding busses because you get to meet many of them. More than if you shut yourself up in your car. Almost all my experiences on busses have been more than favorable. People that want to be alone sit quietly, but often, there's a very nice person on the bus who wants to chat, and for a second you're like a passerby, given the chance to look into the window of a house whose curtains are usually drawn, and glimpse the story unfolding within. The bus ride ends, the drapes close, and you walk away enriched by what you experienced. And maybe you'll get a red card too.
Thursday, August 24, 2006
Day 11: I Missed the Bus
Yes, it's true. I missed the bus. This is a big deal. Currently, I live out at Hwy 6 and Interstate 290--about 45 minutes away NOT during rush hour--so I hop the bus at the local park & ride, make a change at the p&r at the I-10 and 610 intersection, and get to the medical center in about 45 minutes to an hour. That sure beats driving, which would cost me at least one and a half hours in rush hour. Plus, I get to read while riding the bus.
However, coming home is different. If I don't catch the last bus by 6:59pm, I have to take the MetroRAIL up to downtown, walk three blocks, and then catch the bus from there back to my original park & ride. Sounds complicated? Yep, it is. You see, sometimes I'm not even out of class/lab until 5:30pm, and I want to study on campus where everything is so close. There's no way I'll be done by 6:45pm so I can make the 7:00pm bus. However, if not, I'm stuck. metrorails come every 12 minutes or so, and then I gotta walk to the stop. And the bus? Yeah, it comes every hour. So, to make the 7:41pm bus, I have to leave by 7:00pm, because the rail could come anywhere between then and 7:12, it takes 18 minutes to get to downtown, making it possibly 7:30, and then it takes about 7-8minutes to get to the station, for a grand total of 7:38pm.
Yesterday I missed the bus by 4 minutes and had to wait downtown studying notecards at the busstop for an hour. This isn't the first time. Grrr...
However, coming home is different. If I don't catch the last bus by 6:59pm, I have to take the MetroRAIL up to downtown, walk three blocks, and then catch the bus from there back to my original park & ride. Sounds complicated? Yep, it is. You see, sometimes I'm not even out of class/lab until 5:30pm, and I want to study on campus where everything is so close. There's no way I'll be done by 6:45pm so I can make the 7:00pm bus. However, if not, I'm stuck. metrorails come every 12 minutes or so, and then I gotta walk to the stop. And the bus? Yeah, it comes every hour. So, to make the 7:41pm bus, I have to leave by 7:00pm, because the rail could come anywhere between then and 7:12, it takes 18 minutes to get to downtown, making it possibly 7:30, and then it takes about 7-8minutes to get to the station, for a grand total of 7:38pm.
Yesterday I missed the bus by 4 minutes and had to wait downtown studying notecards at the busstop for an hour. This isn't the first time. Grrr...
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
Day 10: Videos
Heaven is streaming videos. The undergraduate experience was decent, mostly because I chose hard classes but ones that had great professors. Here, I don't really get to choose to take anything. I either do and go to med school or don't and do something else...whatever that may be.
Some professors are knowledgeable, but not very good lecturers. However, we have streaming videos!! Someone gets paid $5 an hour (unfortunately not me) to sit in the back and press record and stop. Those videos are uploaded by 4pm that same day, to be watched by all those students who want to see it again, or missed lecture.
This is heaven in Biochem. First, I was a microbiology and history double major in college, hence I've had a lot of biochemistry. Second, the current lecturer likes to stutter, and go on tangents. Therefore, I doze a lot. When I watch the video of lecture, however, I can use Windows media player 10 to speed it up to 1.4x speed. This makes everything go faster, without making words unintelligible. Most every student watches them this way.
Verdict? I get a 45 minute lecture in about 30 minutes, plus the ability to pause, rewind, and review. What a great use of time. Now, what should I do with the hours I was in biochemistry?
Some professors are knowledgeable, but not very good lecturers. However, we have streaming videos!! Someone gets paid $5 an hour (unfortunately not me) to sit in the back and press record and stop. Those videos are uploaded by 4pm that same day, to be watched by all those students who want to see it again, or missed lecture.
This is heaven in Biochem. First, I was a microbiology and history double major in college, hence I've had a lot of biochemistry. Second, the current lecturer likes to stutter, and go on tangents. Therefore, I doze a lot. When I watch the video of lecture, however, I can use Windows media player 10 to speed it up to 1.4x speed. This makes everything go faster, without making words unintelligible. Most every student watches them this way.
Verdict? I get a 45 minute lecture in about 30 minutes, plus the ability to pause, rewind, and review. What a great use of time. Now, what should I do with the hours I was in biochemistry?
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
Day 9: Condos
Medical school is hard, really hard. What makes it crazy is what it isn't--life. Today I skipped lunch and histology lecture/lab (i.e. all afternoon) to go condo hunting with my folks. They wanted to see what my wife and I had found while they were traversing Europe.
Needless to say, things are never done. After taking a closer look at the condo we wanted to make an offer on (well, did, but didn't have a loan so it wasn't finalized) we noticed tons of foundation problems, air duct problems, water leaks, etc.
So...we're retracting our offer that wasn't accepted anyway, and the search continues. Meanwhile, I'm trying to study for school, and wondering where people find the time to do it all. Noticed these are short entries?? Yep. No time to write long ones. Maybe the hectic feeling will wear off by second block, but I doubt it ever ends.
On the up-side, I got Taco Cabana for lunch. Yummy.
Needless to say, things are never done. After taking a closer look at the condo we wanted to make an offer on (well, did, but didn't have a loan so it wasn't finalized) we noticed tons of foundation problems, air duct problems, water leaks, etc.
So...we're retracting our offer that wasn't accepted anyway, and the search continues. Meanwhile, I'm trying to study for school, and wondering where people find the time to do it all. Noticed these are short entries?? Yep. No time to write long ones. Maybe the hectic feeling will wear off by second block, but I doubt it ever ends.
On the up-side, I got Taco Cabana for lunch. Yummy.
Monday, August 21, 2006
Day 8: Week 2
Beginning the second week. I didn't post on the weekend and decided to count those days, that way my day count reflects a real 365/366 days a year.
I skipped developmental anatomy and gross anatomy today and went to the doctor. I've been having huge headaches for about a month now and have a large knot in the back of my neck. The doc said simply that they're tension headaches, not migraines, nothing else serious. All the stress of looking for a condo (still looking) and starting school has lead to serious tightening of my shoulders (now I know the trapezius, levatores scapulae, etc.) and neck. Got a prescription for ibuprofen (says you need antinflammatory drugs for tension headaches, not tylenol), a muscle relaxant to take at night, and massage.
Yes, that's right, I got a prescription for a massage. Doctors rock.
I skipped developmental anatomy and gross anatomy today and went to the doctor. I've been having huge headaches for about a month now and have a large knot in the back of my neck. The doc said simply that they're tension headaches, not migraines, nothing else serious. All the stress of looking for a condo (still looking) and starting school has lead to serious tightening of my shoulders (now I know the trapezius, levatores scapulae, etc.) and neck. Got a prescription for ibuprofen (says you need antinflammatory drugs for tension headaches, not tylenol), a muscle relaxant to take at night, and massage.
Yes, that's right, I got a prescription for a massage. Doctors rock.
Friday, August 18, 2006
Day 5: My Cultural ID
Today we had a seminar on cultural humility. Studies have shown that patients get amazingly better healthcare when they are treated by someone of the same race, ethnic background, religion, etc. This may be shocking at first, but it really isn't that groundbreaking. Look at the people you associate with--they all have significant things in common with you.
A physician is no different. Obviously, a doctor that hails from the south will understand my love for brisket or biscuits and gravy more than someone from New York. Neither might be a bad doctor, but the connection will make me feel at ease and probably open up a little more. That extra info I share can often be crucial in diagnosing a disease.
This situation is even more pronounced in ethnic and racial differences. I have many African-American friends, but I can't say I empathize with them. I don't know what it's like to live my life with a skin color that changes how people view me, affects my ability to get a job, etc. I experienced it for awhile in Vietnam, but 6 months is far different from 26 years. I can sympathize, but never empathize.
That empathetic connection can be crucial in some patients, and sympathetic people are always crucial. That's why we get cultural humility training from week one now. It's important, and it's worth it. I'm thankful for it.
A physician is no different. Obviously, a doctor that hails from the south will understand my love for brisket or biscuits and gravy more than someone from New York. Neither might be a bad doctor, but the connection will make me feel at ease and probably open up a little more. That extra info I share can often be crucial in diagnosing a disease.
This situation is even more pronounced in ethnic and racial differences. I have many African-American friends, but I can't say I empathize with them. I don't know what it's like to live my life with a skin color that changes how people view me, affects my ability to get a job, etc. I experienced it for awhile in Vietnam, but 6 months is far different from 26 years. I can sympathize, but never empathize.
That empathetic connection can be crucial in some patients, and sympathetic people are always crucial. That's why we get cultural humility training from week one now. It's important, and it's worth it. I'm thankful for it.
Thursday, August 17, 2006
Day 4: Water cooler talk
I took the park & ride into school today for the first time. Got to school about an hour and a half early, so I could study, since I got no studying done last night (long story).
Sat down, opened Biochem, and overheard a couple 4th year students running the OBGYN club table talking. One said this:
Sat down, opened Biochem, and overheard a couple 4th year students running the OBGYN club table talking. One said this:
"So I have the worst patient. The other day, four cousins came to see him and they got in a fist-fight in the hall outside his room. We had to call security. When security arrived, they found crack in the pockets of two of them, but that's not the end of it. Scared because of the crack they were trying to hide, they admitted that the car the took to get here and was parked in the hospital garage was stolen."Gotta love medicine.
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Day 3: Gross Anatomy
Today was the first day in Gross Anatomy and the first time I actually cut into a human body. I can't express the emotions. It's weird to cut into the flesh of another human, even if he or she is already dead. Cultural prohibitions, you know??
Out of it all, here's the tidbit of info I learned:
Humans have red, striated muscle like the beef you buy at the grocery store.
However, we have yellow fat like chickens (beef and pork have white fat).
Out of it all, here's the tidbit of info I learned:
Humans have red, striated muscle like the beef you buy at the grocery store.
However, we have yellow fat like chickens (beef and pork have white fat).
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Day 2: Revolving Feelings
Here I am, sitting in Histology, and wondering to myself,
"Can I do it?"
My feelings fly back and forth, like a pendulum...no an old grandfather clock, where the pendulum swings left and right and left and right and...
...and with each swing the tick of the clock echoes, reverberates in the back of my mind.
You see, I sit in Histo, or Biochem, or Devo, and I think to myself
"I have done this before. This isn't new. It's got some new parts, but it's not wholly new. More importantly, the concepts aren't hard. I can do this."
Then I look at the amount of material and pace of my courses and I think to myself
"I am dead. There is so much material to cover. The classes move incredibly fast. I can't do this."
Which brings the pendulum back to vertical, and sounds another tick in the back of my head. Time is running short.
"Can I do it?"
"Yes, I can."
"Can I do it?"
My feelings fly back and forth, like a pendulum...no an old grandfather clock, where the pendulum swings left and right and left and right and...
...and with each swing the tick of the clock echoes, reverberates in the back of my mind.
You see, I sit in Histo, or Biochem, or Devo, and I think to myself
"I have done this before. This isn't new. It's got some new parts, but it's not wholly new. More importantly, the concepts aren't hard. I can do this."
Then I look at the amount of material and pace of my courses and I think to myself
"I am dead. There is so much material to cover. The classes move incredibly fast. I can't do this."
Which brings the pendulum back to vertical, and sounds another tick in the back of my head. Time is running short.
"Can I do it?"
"Yes, I can."
Monday, August 14, 2006
Day 1: First Impressions
Chirp ... chirp ... chirp ... DA NA NA DA NA NA NA NA nuh NA! Startled, I awoke as my first alarm gave way to the blaring of the star spangled banner that is my second alarm. Rising out of bed, I showered and ate a quick bowl of Life, and headed out the door.
Traffic was heavy, but not stand-still. Nevertheless, I was tired by the time I got to school. What was I doing? Should I be a student? Again? It's been so long....
I stood in line and paid $117.26 for syllabi. What are syllabi?? They're paperback books, textbooks, thick ones, ones that every med student dreads and loves, because with them come hours of pain, yet knowledge that will let you care for your patients later.
Class was as great as stale bread dipped in muddy water. I sat on the third row. My classmates were friendly--all of them. I do have a great class. I predict I will have some great professors too. Unfortunately, even in medical school the first day of classes is filled with necessary but inane banter about procedures, syllabi, reading materials, how to not fail, who's hot and who's not, etc.
Ultimately, the clock hit 3:30pm and I stood up dazed.
"All done? Nah... couldn't be. But it is!?"
And then the realization of the amount of homework I had--even on the first day--hit me.
"I guess it's never done."
Nope. Never. I have started on the journey to become a physician. I entered the doors of medical school today, swearing a life of moral uprightness, long hours, hard work, and determination. I will be a good student so I can be a good doctor so I can be an instrument for comfort and health and happiness to those who trust me with their care. I will be a doctor.
Traffic was heavy, but not stand-still. Nevertheless, I was tired by the time I got to school. What was I doing? Should I be a student? Again? It's been so long....
I stood in line and paid $117.26 for syllabi. What are syllabi?? They're paperback books, textbooks, thick ones, ones that every med student dreads and loves, because with them come hours of pain, yet knowledge that will let you care for your patients later.
Class was as great as stale bread dipped in muddy water. I sat on the third row. My classmates were friendly--all of them. I do have a great class. I predict I will have some great professors too. Unfortunately, even in medical school the first day of classes is filled with necessary but inane banter about procedures, syllabi, reading materials, how to not fail, who's hot and who's not, etc.
Ultimately, the clock hit 3:30pm and I stood up dazed.
"All done? Nah... couldn't be. But it is!?"
And then the realization of the amount of homework I had--even on the first day--hit me.
"I guess it's never done."
Nope. Never. I have started on the journey to become a physician. I entered the doors of medical school today, swearing a life of moral uprightness, long hours, hard work, and determination. I will be a good student so I can be a good doctor so I can be an instrument for comfort and health and happiness to those who trust me with their care. I will be a doctor.
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